Positively Charming Things

Dear Fawkes, I know you don't enjoy the crate or car rides, but you haven't been feeling well lately so I was taking you to the doctor.  I knew you may have an accident in your crate, which is why I was smart and brought plastic bags and paper towels, and even lined the crate with paper towels.  When we arrived at the vet's office, I was right and you had peed.  When I let you out in the exam room, I took out the soiled towel and put it in one of the bags to throw away and put clean towels…

Dearest Human, You know I detest the crate, and dislike car rides even more.  Yet you stuffed me into one and took me for a spin. So I peed in the crate.  You're welcome. We went someplace new.  Well, maybe I had been there before, but it had been a while since our last "trip", so it was still new to me.  The ladies were friendly, except the first one who stuck something up my backside.  W T F?  Don't do that again. Thanks. Then you shoved me BACK into the crate (gee, thanks), and back…